I have been thinking a lot how to summarize these last 20 years with my wonderful husband...and I have had somewhat of a loss for words. How do you describe someone that has been a literal dream come true? It is hard for me to do. He has so many qualities that I love and respect. Plus, the way he treats me is so much better than I deserve! I am grateful to God for him.

I thought it would be neat to summarize our 20 years together by listing "20 Blessings of our Marriage". God has truly blessed us through our marriage and I think it is appropriate to give credit where credit is due: To God who made it all happen! We definitely can not boast in ourselves--but, I can boast in the Lord! He brought us together and He is the One who sustains us!!!

20 Blessings of our Marriage

1) Mike loves me as Christ loves the church...well, please don't think I mean as perfectly as Christ did...we all know that Christ loved the church so much that He gave Himself up for her.(Ephesians 5:25-26) Which is perfect love...but husbands should be working on loving their wives in a self sacrificing way as they mature in Christ and want to obey God. It is a beautiful blessing when your husband shows you that he loves you this way! It will never be perfect, though...: )

2) Mike shows honor to me as the weaker vessel. (1 Peter 3:17) And, I love this! There is nothing that I appreciate more than Mike opening the door for me when we are getting into the car or going in somewhere...carrying the heavy loads of groceries...moving things I would like moved...helping me get up(this will become more important as we age, but I still need help every once in a while--especially when I was pregnant!) God made us as the weaker ones and I love that my husband understands that and showers me like a gentlemen should! My girls have watched my husband be this way over the years, which shows them a lot to look for one day!

3) Mike tries to live with me in an understanding way. This goes right along with showing honor because she is the weaker vessel, in fact, they understand their wives by understanding that she is the weaker one. I must say this is not his normal tendency, though. He wants to help *fix* things and gets easily frustrated when he can't. At times he has not been understanding, but impatient with me and frustrated. Early in our marriage that would *hurt my feelings* at times and I would end up sobbing over being scolded and not understood. Over the years, though, God has softened his heart to try and understand me more....and I'm sure from his standpoint, that has been a very complicated process. :0 But, every husband, who is a believer, should put forth his greatest effort to try and know his wife and understand her. (1 Peter 3:7) I appreciate and respect Mike's efforts in this area! It has blessed me very much!

4) We have great conversations. That makes me love being with him...We love having very in depth conversations about every topic we can think of. We always have something to talk about. And it is always very interesting!

5) He tells me what I need to hear, not what I want to hear. That is very important to me. This is especially true in the area of sinfulness in my own life. He has helped me see my sin so many times...and it has not always been with his words, but sometimes with his actions. I see his example and see my own selfishness.

6) Children has been one of the greatest blessings of our marriage! We are so blessed in this area! We truly believe that children are a blessing from the Lord...even on those hard days when no one is obeying and selfishness abounds in my children's hearts, we still see them as extreme blessings from God. So the the discipline and guidance we give them is an opportunity to show them God's love and the gospel. That is a blessing!

7) Having a Christian home is a great blessing. I love that family worship time is a priority to my husband...I love that we pray together as a family and as a couple...I am blessed greatly to have this in my life!

8) Forgiveness has been a great blessing for both of us. We have had to forgive eachother many, many times in our marriage...and this reminds us of how our Heavenly Father loves us so much that, through Christ's death on the cross, we can be forgiven. Our level of forgiveness is not much compared to how God forgives us.

9) Just the blessing of getting to spend time with my best friend is great! I am still, after 20 years, eager for him to get home from work. Like a child I wait for him to walk through the door!

10) Mike is the head of our home. I love strong leadership...not mean, bossy leadership, but strong, loving servant type leadership that the Bible speaks of. There is nothing more attractive in a man than one who is confident and leads his family to love God and makes sure that his every effort is on serving and leading his family! Just a sidenote, no husband is going to be perfect in any of these areas...mine is not, but to see him working on these things is where he should be as a believer...that is a blessing!

11) I am blessed by a husband who provides for us, so that I am not needed to work outside the home. When he chose his occupation as a 14 year old boy, he knew he wanted a job where he could provide for his family well and be home with them a lot. I think it is so sweet that he was thinking of us even way back then!

12) One of the blessings I have come to appreciate recently is that fact that neither of us are perfect and we have sinfulness in our lives (I have always known this, but really living it out makes our marriage better, let me explain...)...we have accepted this truth, while still trying to be holy as He is holy. It makes it much easier to see our need for a Savior when we acknowledge that we are never going to be perfect this side of heaven and we can accept eachother's imperfections knowing that God is still at work in us.

13) I have a best friend to talk to--anytime and he always listens.

14) We have shared heartaches together, which may not seem like a blessing at all, but it is. We have grown in our own love for God through various trials and have learned to love eachother on a deeper level through things that have hurt us.

15) Mike guides me and our daughters in the area of modesty and biblical womanhood. This is a big blessing to our whole family. I think I know what is modest, but sometimes I am wrong and Mike, as a man, shows great wisdom in this area.

16) God has sustained us over the years. He is the One who keeps us together...in a world where divorce is an easy option, God has been so good to us by showing us His ways and plans for our marriage. We want God to be glorified through His work in us.

17) I have been blessed by having a husband who likes to take long walks on the beach at night...I'm not sure if he really likes it or he just does it because he knows I like it...but I love those special romantic times!

18) One of the greatest blessings is seeing our children walking in the Truth. Only God can get credit for this as we try to serve Him in our parenting.

19) Treasuring each moment together is a blessing that we need to remember each day...only our Sovereign Lord knows how many days we will be together...

20) God is growing us as He teaches us through earthly relationships--which is most importantly the marriage relationship. That is such an important blessing from God--that he loves us enough to show us our need for Him as we learn and grow in our marriage! What a wonderful way for God to mature and sanctify us!

Happy 20th Anniversary, Mike! I will always love you!